I believe that I have located the most politically correct person in
America, possibly the world. I was going to call him the most politically
correct man, but after hearing his resume, I'm sure you'll agree that the
word "man" might not be appropriate.
I found out about him from one of my correspondents in the Washington,
DC, area, who sent me a copy of a left-wing newspaper called the Washington
Peace Letter, containing an article entitled "Why March?" by
an individual named Elias Farajaje-Jones. The article is a long exposition
of the reasons the writer had for marching in the so-called "gay rights"
march in Washington.
Let me give you a sample of his writing from this article:
"As a queer-identified Bi spanish-speaking african native american
(tsalagi/cherokee) womanist/mujerista man, i must march ...because it is
part of my heritage of 500 years of resistance to columbus' legacy of racism
and oppression. I cannot rest because if one Rodney King can be beaten
senseless and those who did it go free, i know that the same thing can
happen to millions of queers at any moment. I cannot rest as long as there
is heterocentrism.... I cannot rest as long as queer lovers and friends,
partners, companions, are not recognized as family, in a meaning that we
have given or better yet restored to the word....
"I cannot rest as long as people with AIDS are forced to continually
live under a system of ApartAIDS....
"I cannot rest as long as there is no universal health care in
this country....
"I cannot rest until lesbians and bisexual women (who are not only
struggling against oppression in the dominant culture, but also within
a white male-dominated queerworld) are recognized for their leadership
and allowed to lead us...."
Sounds a little bit like a speechwriter for Bill Clinton, doesn't he?
But the best part is the little biographical sketch at the end of his article:
"Elias Farajaje-Jones, a spanish-speaking African Native American...
...is an anarchist guerrilla theologian / AIDS activist / writer / performance
artist, living in the colonial territory known as the District of Columbia.
He is a tenured professor [!] at the Howard University School of Divinity
where, besides history of religions, he teaches multiculturalism, AIDS
issues, sociology of heteropatriarchy and gender studies. A member of the
Washington Peace Center community, he is founder of moving violations,
a group for bi men of colour, and bi people of colour against aparthAIDS.
A contributor to several bi anthologies, he is currently editing an anthology
bi any means necessary, of works of bi men of colour. He is also an AIDSwidow."
Now, my friends, that is the kind of thing that's impossible to make
up -- the kind of thing that can only be produced by a sick, sick society.
What a set of qualifications this creature has! It's no wonder that the
Howard University School of Divinity snapped him up. Surely any corporation
or government agency with a sharp "affirmative action" office
ought to be making him offers left and right, considering how many officially-protected
minority groups he simultaneously belongs to.
If any of you listeners out there can come up with someone that you
can convince me is more politically correct than Elias Farajaje-Jones,
I'll send you a free copy of any audio tape in our catalog, your choice.
Update
American Dissident Voices listener L.G. of Canada sends the following
letter and pictures, including an entry into our "Most Politically
Correct Person" search, and so far, he is the winner.
Mr. L.G. of Ottawa, Ontario is one of our most prolific and interesting
letter writers. He writes:
"Dear Kevin:
"Things must be getting pretty hairy down there in the United States,
what with Slick Willy wanting to import all of those Haitian refugees.
...Of course, Canada will almost certainly be suckered into taking lots
and lots of them. I'm pretty angry about the media hoopla about those Hutu
refugees in Zaire -- of course, they wouldn't even have a cholera epidemic
if they hadn't used their drinking water for a sewer....
"We're sending you some photos of a "gay pride" parade
that [recently] took place in Ottawa.... We've... put some comments on
the backs... of the photos, just to put them in better context (also, my
wife and I felt the urge to exercise our wit.)"
Thank you, L.G. Some of these photographs of the pro-pervert parade
are absolutely amazing and disgusting. What we see on our TV news programs
about these homosexual events is a very sanitized version, purposefully
crafted to make the best impression on the viewer. What L.G. has sent includes
the bits the editors cut out. I'll try to describe them to you.
One of the things the editors leave out are the huge banners, replete
with hammers and sickles, proclaiming, in this case, "Communist Party
of Canada" as we see in this picture. Next we see a man wearing a
woman's dress, carrying a sign reading "Socialist Worker -- Gay and
Straight -- Fight the Bigots -- International Socialists." Next we
see a large pickup truck in the parade, carrying several rather attractive
young women, with a sign reading "Dykes Demand Action." Mr L.G.
writes on the back "It's a crying shame -- so many decent looking
White women fall into the trap of lesbianism." One of these lesbians
is wearing a T-shirt, reading "We recruit." Think about that
one for a while. In the next picture we see two men wearing women's clothing,
hairdos and makeup carrying a large banner promoting "the Gender Mosaic"
whatever that is. Next we have a picture which L.G. captions "How
politically correct! A fashion-challenged, cross-dressing, alternative
sexuality African-Canadian.... Do I win the free tape, Kevin?" In
the next picture we see one of the posters put up by these advocates of
freedom. It shows two young men, one a sleazy-looking White and the other
an Oriental, engaging in tongue-kissing. The caption reads: "Enjoying
your orientation? QUEERS ARE HERE!"
The sickest and, to me, the most shocking photograph is of an attractive
young woman, blonde and perhaps 18 or 20 years of age. This girl, who is
entering the years when she should be becoming a wife and a mother and
taking her place in the continuation of the race, has obviously become
a lesbian. She is wearing several slogans on her clothing. One says, "I
like women." Another reads, "we recruit." The saddest reads,
and I'll have to bleep it somewhat, "I f - - - to come, not to conceive."
A people whose young women are taught to accept such attitudes towards
their creator-given ability to conceive and bear the next generation is
a people who have rejected their very existence. Such women are not feminists:
they have rejected the entire natural feminine nature, they have rejected
life itself.
Thanks for your letter, Mr. L.G., I always enjoy them and I also like
your closing comment: "Our victory is inevitable."
If anyone can top L.G.'s "most politically correct" entry,
you have until April 1st, 1995, to get your entry in.